Mary’s Newsletters

Contents

 

Newsletter 1 - Written 23rd of April 2007

 

Greetings to one and all.

 

We did it, we are now officially grey nomads! 

I never did manage to get everything prepared at home ready for the kids but, who cares now!  There were many tears on the morning of our departure especially from me, I cried all the way to Greenough.  Talk about puffy eyes.  On arrival our next-door neighbours were Peter and Jenni Greenham (no relation to my Felicity Greenham) who live and work in Mt Margaret teaching our indigenous folk.  The first thing I learnt that day was that “drinkies” is from midday onwards.  God I hope the whole 12 months is not a drink fest.  We had a lovely 3 days there making sure that everything in the caravan works before we got too far into our trip.  On our arrival into Geraldton we assumed that Crayfish would be in abundance and cheap having planned a seafood BBQ for that night, wrong, at $40.00kg we gave the Cray’s a miss.  I had a very small piece of Salmon and that cost $6bucks and Gazza had some snaggers.   Our journey to Kalbarri was smooth going passing a huge pink lake on the way, somewhere behind Port Gregory.  On arrival in Kalberri we settled in at the Murchison caravan park, which is across the road from the Pelican feeding ground.  Have yet to see it happen as they feed them too early in the morning, 8.45am I believe.  We have visited all the tourist spots, one in particular was the mushroom rocks.  I had Gary set up for a lovely snap shot with the ocean in the background and as usual, on the count of 3, smile!  Then I immediately yelled “WAVE, WAVE, WAVE” and started running away whilst Gary, still smiling, waved to Dave and Merrilyn on the beach.  Luckily the wave was not that big. Dinner most nights is around the BBQ with the mandatory “bottles” of wine.  We have come with 4 dozen bottles of wine, the idea being that it will last us till we reach Darwin.  Our first week away and we are down 7 bottles already.  Elisa, Gary and I soo enjoyed the Cannelloni; it was lovely to eat in and not be around those others that make us drink lots. The other day we visited the Kalberri National Park, took lots of photos and decided to take one of the walks down to the Gorge.  They did advise that it was a challenging walk with some difficulty and I thought it meant for those that are physically challenged.  The path started off easily enough but, as we started to descend into the gorge the paths narrowed and the stepping rocks became jumps and at one point the path was less than 1 meter wide with a ladder which one had to ascend 12 feet upwards only to discover a narrow walk way across a rock with a 20foot drop on each side to another ladder that upon climbing down, more rocks to jump across.  For my poor Gazza this was quite a challenge considering he suffers vertigo.  Reaching the bottom of the gorge we were in awe of what Mother Nature had created.  Truly worth the walk, of course we had to go back the same way.  That night we slept well.

 

Today is our last day here in beautiful Kalbarri, a warm 26c with no wind and lovely clear blue skies.  What shall we do today?

 

Catch you soon.

Mary

 

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Newsletter 2 - Written 30th of April 2007

 

Greetings once again,

 

As we left Kalbarri and headed for Shark Bay I was disgusted at the amount of rubbish that was littering the verges of the North West Coastal Highway.  Bottles, Cans, bits of plastic, where does it all come from?  At one Road house stop the owner said that it was caravaner’s, but most people our age know better, or am I mistaken, are there a load of piggy wiggies out there who really know no better.  The other thing that surprised me were the dead carcases on the side of the road and they were not what I expected to see. Your warned about kangaroos but the dead goats were many, I heard that one goat recently caused a huge Road Truck to burst into flames after colliding with it.  From memory it was a travelling show that was called “Crusty Demon’s?” a kind of motorbike stunt show. What I remember most is, come and see our “Crusty Babes”, the thought of crusty girls makes me think of wrinkly old ladies with sleep still in their eyes from having their afternoon nana nap!  There were also the odd Emu’s, with their legs sticking up in the air and the Cattle, roaming on the verges eating the fresh new grass shoots that have sprung up from the recent rain. If a goat can bring down a huge Crusty Truck, what would a huge cow do to us pulling a small caravan?  I am happy to say that we arrived safely at Shark Bay staying at Nanga Bay Holiday Resort. Just the name bought visions of lawns, palm trees tennis courts swimming pool etc.  When we crested the hill that led us into the resort I was stunned at what awaited us.  If we thought that our sand patch at Kalbarri was a little rough, then that was nothing on what greeted us at Nanga.  Dusty white dirt. There was a tennis court but, little was left of the net and what was there had pink & grey galahs doing somersaults on it.  There was a small patch of grass in the children’s playground and palm trees, there were lots of palm trees and  they were lovely. There was an artesian spa pool, it had a yellow tinge to it which Gary said was probably sulphur, I could just imagine what my beautiful expensive white bathers would look like after half and hour in there.  The ablution block was a converted old ship container, which was also a nesting ground for sparrows.  Gary asked one of the residents about the camper’s kitchen, they said it was OK but not to open the fridge!

We still had a great  time there in our wonderfully appointed caravan although we did have to cart our own water into the van, which made me appreciate fresh water on tap at home. 

We settled in quickly and I requested that we jump into the car with our camp chairs, glasses and a cold bottle of bubbly and head off to Shell Beach to watch the sunset.  After a 10km drive we arrived at our destination walked across this amazing beach made of tiny white shells set up our chairs only to discover that the sun sets not over the bay but behind us over the hill.  It was still lovely and I couldn’t help myself I just had to take a few tiny shells home. I’m surprised that Gary did not make me weigh them and log it into the computer.  The following day we headed off for Denham, a 50km drive, what a lovely spot but somewhere Id like not to be if there was a Tsunami.  The ocean seems very low there and I believe it is quite shallow; sadly it was too cool a day for swimming.  Actually since we left Perth there have only been 4 cloudless sunny days.  You don’t visit shark bay without going to Monkey Mia to see the dolphins.  25km more and we arrive there at about 1pm, there is a $6.00pp charge and the ranger informed us that the dolphins arrived early that day so we missed them.  A 150km return trip and we missed the dolphins!   All I can say is that I am glad we went to Shell Beach, which cost us nothing and was a 20km return trip to our “Resort”

That night Gary and David went to have a soak in the Artesian Spa while I went for a lovely walk along the beach only to discover lots of tiny, tiny shells on the beach at the back of our caravan site. Yes I did sneak in some more shells.  Dinner was a lovely feast of frozen Shark Bay mullet fillets which we purchased in Denham @ $4.00 for 4 pieces of fish. The cheapest so far and they BBQ very nicely.

 

Did I mention the flies?  The game was how many can you swat on someone’s back and kill with one hand.  David won with a one-swat sweep of 15.  Where do they all come from? There is nothing here except white dirt and sand!

 

Off to Carnarvon the next morning.  Interesting drive there, more rubbish, more goats, more cows and some emu’s. Red dirt and saltbush was the landscape all the way there.  Before you see the town you see the Big Dish.  Its very impressive, shame it is now not in use.  The sight of lush green banana trees greeted us first as one would expect and then Bougainvillea, lots of it everywhere in all its glorious colours.  Our caravan park had “lawn”,  we finally had a lovely lawn around our van.  Some people advised us against visiting this town but I am glad we did, its lovely.  How fortunate was our timing, that morning we went to see the river (Gascoyne) flow, the previous day it was just a dry river bed, I think every man and his dog from the town was there.  The town centre could easily be mistaken for the café strip in Fremantle, the new canal housing estate could be Mandurah and the 1mile jetty walk could have been Busselton.  Again it was overcast but still warm. In fact it reminded me of Bali a little. That evening we feasted on some local produce Oysters Kilpatrick and Crumbed Scallops accompanied by a lovely Chardy, mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Following day a visit to the Blow Holes was well worth the trip, it really is quite awesome and I can understand how someone can be swept away by a king wave.

A local told us to drive about 400mtrs south of the Blow Holes to a bay (which they call the blow holes) and swim there.  What a surprise it was, a coral bay full of amazing fish of all colours, coral of all colours and even a turtle to boot.  Best snorkelling so far.  We had hoped to drive to Red Bluff but 30km into the trip we realised that there was another 30km rough dirt drive, so we settled on visiting the wreckage of the Korean Star.  What a sight, so much heavy iron just tossed up 5 to 10 meters onto a rock ledge all twisted and tangled.  So much power to do this you would think that someone could harness this energy and put it to use.  It was a long day and we slept well that night after a nice BBQ and another bottle of Chardy.

 

Next stop, Coral Bay.  Arriving mid afternoon we get a spot on a bare patch again, there is lawn but not on our patch.   Gary just loves his lawn but is not impressed with Coral Bay, too many flies and smells fishy.   At my  request we are booked in for 2 nights. Did a quick snorkel that afternoon but was a little too cloudy to see much and the tide was in so it was also too deep.  Will try again tomorrow morning.

Thinking of you, wish you were here, but!

 

Cheers All

Mary

 

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Newsletter 3 – Written 16th of May 2007

 

Hello to all,

 

Arrived at coral bay and was surprised at how small the town is.  The caravan park is ok, Gary marched in and requested “the front row” which overlooks the beach but it was full so we were designated a spot out the back.  It is a busy park so there were vacancies for only one night but we were told to enquire the next day.  Not only was there a vacancy for two more nights but we got one in the front lot only we were in the third row.  We still had glimpses of the ocean and the sunset, and, it cost an extra $4.00 per night, at least we now had some lawn.  The town was full of “sven” look-alikes (hubba hubba) and english was almost the second language.  As the weather was not 100% clear during our stay the water was not as clear as it could have been so the snorkelling for me was not as great as at Carnarvon.

 

Our next stop, Exmouth.  Driving into what one would expect to be a small fishing/navy town, I was blown away to see a canal development big enough to rival Mandurah.  At  $400,00.00 starting price for a tinsie bit of land, it tells me we are paying way tooooo much for fish and perhaps one should seriously consider joining the navy, I mean who else lives here. Check it out on the web www.exmouthmarinavillage.com  Our caravan park was better than we expected and we settled into our red dust partly lawn spot.  We were well located as across the road was the local sporting ground and the town was having a Whale Shark festival that weekend, which means there is a beer tent!  They did also sell wine and even bubbly though the beer tasted better (Hahn light).  I had no idea there were gorges here and they were pretty impressive.  One was able to drive across the top Knife Edge gorge)  and also drive through the bottom (Shothole gorge) although the top had amazing views driving through the bottom was even more impressive, a must do when visiting there.  Snorkelling is as good as what one gets at coral bay perhaps even a smidge better, it was something I did not expect. No ankle biting Sharks.

 

When in Exmouth a must is to go deep-sea fishing.  Yes I did it and yes there is the story of the one that got away.  Firstly there was the capt’n, a true crusty ole salt of the sea. His name be capt’n Kieron O’Brien, Kieron! Hardly a captain’s name. He was no Jack Sparrow but he did speak with an arrr in his voice.  Along with myself was our buddy Dave (Gary does not like fishing) and two english couples in their mid twenties.  My choice of fish catcher was the hand reel winch, 200lb line, the young kids, fishing rods.  I knew that I had the better chance of reeling in the “big ones”.  After two hours of feeding bait to the fish (whilst the young kids between them had caught 5  4kg fish) I got a tug on my line so I quickly tugged back and yes! it was hooked. So I started reeling in and every couple of seconds I would check the line to make sure it was still there.  At first it was heavy but I could manage to bring in my big fish but after a short while it got harder to reel in so I started to use my left hand (being my stronger hand) and capt’s said “what arrr ya doin woman, use ya right and (hand)”  but I can’t capt'n its tooooo big! “don’t be silly wench it’s a 200lb line”. So I continued to struggle to the point where the boat was been pulled down on the port starboard side noticeably.  Then the capt’n took notice, give it ere he says,  arrrrrr ya ave got a big en, me believes it to be shark, a big en.  Well there you are straight from the capt’ns  lips, “a big one” but alas it broke the line hook sinker and all, the boat came back to its balance in the ocean and I still had no fish.  I did eventually catch a 3kg spotted emperor, which we enjoyed that night.  Not much meat when you fillet the damn things though. Of course those poms caught even more fish, there should be a law against them coming here and catching my fish.

 

I have decided that every day is a bad hair day so I am seriously considering dreadlocks.  All the clothes I brought with me I have yet to wear,  bathers, shorts and sarong seem to be the most practical.  The other day I wore my Armani skirt with my D & G sequined top, a Dior belt and gold sandals,  I got looks like I was a possibly a hooker, at least I hope they thought I was an expensive one!  A quick change back to hippy and I was right.

 

Tom price was next as this was our way into Karijini national park.  The North West Coastal Highway from this point (exiting Exmouth) takes you through some breath taking scenery.  The hills through here are big and beautiful with all the colours one sees in postcards.  Tom Price was a surprise, not a dusty dirty town but a lush green oasis with palm trees galore. We only stayed one night as the next day Karijini was our destination but not before doing a coach tour of the mine site.  It is big, really really big, a tour that is worth the $18 we paid for the 90 minute trip. 

 

Karijini, our expectations intense as all who we spoke to said it is a must do.  Liars!!!!  You have to be a damn mountain goat to get down to all the scenery that one sees in books and postcards.  The gorges are deep and the climb down has no safety rails to help you down.  Some of the spectacular sights are in areas where you need to abseil and swim across pools of water to get to “the spot”.  Gary and I managed to descend into Dales Gorge and swim in the circular pool then trek to the Fortescue Falls, trek further to Fern Pool for another swim before ascending back up to the top.  It was beautiful but if you suffer from vertigo its not that pleasant.  Staying there you needed to be self reliant on power and water, there were drop toilets and they were nice and clean and not smelly at all.  With no lights at night the sky becomes full of bright stars and so many.  The Milky Way is just as it says, milky, something that is hard to see with the naked eye when in town.  The Dingoes’ howling in the night was spooky; we had to make sure nothing was left outside, as the dingoes will take it away. Makes you think about the chamberlain case so many years ago.  Any one visiting the park I suggest that in order to get a good look, pay for a guided tour, and you need to be reasonably fit.

 

Port Hedland, here we come and then we left.  One night, in out and really not much to see. 

Broom was 611km away so we have to have a petrol stop half way.  Pardoo road-house was the sort of half way stop to fuel up and get a bite to eat.  They bake the most enormous sausage rolls, truck driver size.  Gary of course had to have one being a sort of little truck cum 4wd person.  The verdict was, the best one I have ever had.  I opted for the spring roll, which had more oil on it than the vat it was fried in.  But, it was still “noice”.   108kms down the road we pulled into an overnight stop.  It was lovely but the drop toilet was very smelly and the flies, the flies, so many flies, luckily we poured aero guard  on us and enjoyed wine and cheese outside on the picnic table after we scrubbed it down.

 

Broome, here we are. Civilisation, where I can wear my designer labels and not be mistaken for a hooker!  My first Mr Bean moment  Its mandatory to check out the ablutions upon arrival, which I did, and as I was there and it checked out to be very “noice” I decided to take the opportunity to do business.  As all ladies know you line the seat with toilet paper first so as I tried to yank out a few sheets the whole damn roll fell out and as luck would have it, straight into the toilet.  Still holding one end, natural reaction is to pull on the paper as only half the roll was immersed in the toilet bowl.  The more I pulled, the more the roll went into the toilet until the whole roll was in.  What to do?  Ah! I noticed a toilet brush in the corner so quickly I retrieved it and plunged it into the toilet bowl trying to scoop out the paper ASAP but the more I plunged the more the paper disintegrated.  You can imagine the sound coming out of the toilet  someone calling out “are you OK” yes, yes, I replied.  By this time there was just mush in the bowl.  What to do, what to do?  Flush! And so I did.  My big fear was that it might overflow but to my relief it all disappeared down the bowl as I immediately did out the door.  Have not been back to that one since.   Our caravan park is green, tropical and the best ablutions we have seen so far and probably the only ones for the next 3,000.00km.  The pool is crystal clear and huge.  All is good for now.   Are there enough pearl shops here?  A whole street lined on both sides.  It is surely mandatory to just have a look!  We did.  Spent a whole afternoon just having a peek.  As luck would have it, the first shop I entered (Broome Staircase Designs Pearl Gallery in Napier Tce) had a lovely piece that caught my eye.  With this lovely trinket in mind I was now seriously comparing all to “This One” a golden coloured two pearl drop necklet, one of the many “one off” designs.  I found some of the big name stores overwhelming with size and price, and were you paying more for a name than quality.  Any way  I pondered for two days about this lovely pearl trinket at Broome Staircase Designs.  So I went back for another look and realised this was “The One” and happily parted with my money.   There were many more unique designs is this store than most of the others and I recommend you definitely give this establishment a look in.   I think its because it’s a female run business and the designer is always on hand to assist you in making the right choice (and no, I do not get any commission for this recommendation) and taking the mystery out of what to look for as far as quality goes.

Broome is such a lovely place, we have decided to spend 10 days here and take the time to relax, read trashy magazines and laze on the beach, so catch you all later.

 

Cheers

Mary

 

   

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Newsletter 4 – Written 12th of June 2007

 

Hello to one and all,

 

By now you must be wondering if I miss home?  Well yes I do.  I miss my kitchen with all my 56 herbs and spices to choose from, MY SHOES and matching hand bags,  my wardrobe, my big ensuite bathroom, my sporty car (being looked after by the wonderful Simon) but most of all I miss my girls and my two mums.  Big, big hugs to my special girls. And big brother, I miss you too, and Jane and Jim, thank god for emails.

 

Caravanning, its not life as we know it.  I have noticed that at the crack of dawn there is the march of the DGB (dressing gown brigade).  They all march towards the ablution, a line of grey haired ladies in their tent size terry towel gowns clutching bathroom drawstring bags probably containing Cashmere Bouquet soap and lots n lots of talcum powder (I am strictly a T-shirt n shorts and platform thongs person). I recall one park asking ladies “To Refrain from using Talcum Powder” in the ablutions, not quite sure why.  Whilst still in Broom at the lovely Cable Beach Park I was just finishing my shower when I heard the little girl in the cubicle next to mine proclaiming loudly to her mother, “mummy I am going to have a nice pee in the shower” (as the partition did not completely separate us at ground level) a panicked mother quickly replied “NO! NO!” not here.  I very quickly exited the shower hoping the mum was quick enough to have done something like, gee what could she have done.

Thank god for my platform thongs although I did get out pretty quick.

 

 

Off to Derby we go, the land of the Boab tree.  Driving along the main street one is greeted by beautiful big fat boabs growing in a line down the middle of the pedestrian strip.  A stop at The Derby Boab Inn for a quick drink is a must, suitable attire is required, thongs and singlet.  Lots to see here,  we take a flight over the Buccaneer Archipelago, which encompasses the Horizontal Waterfall, Cockatoo Island (which is now being mined for Iron Ore and no longer a resort) and the Leprosarium.  Our plane is a ditsy little 5 seater job (Cessna) with the wing strut held together with masking tape and the wing tips pointing downwards and not up like on the big planes. Did someone attach them upside down? The interior resembles that of a 1960s mini minor and definitely showing wear and tear, do I feel nervous? Hell yes! My hands are sweating as we take off (did I mention our pilot is female) now my hands sweat even more, everything is shaking as we scoot down the runway,  I realise my headphones are faulty, will know one hear my screams as we plunge down to earth out of control, perhaps that’s why I get the faulty headphones.  As we depart terra firma and lift up, up and away I figure the pilot must be pretty good to get this old thing in the air.  My faith restored in the ability of a female pilot flying what no man would dare, I relax and enjoy the flight.  Other places of interest here were the Boab Prison Tree  (1500 years old) Myall’s Bore and Cattle Trough (120 meters long and could handle 500 bullocks at one time) the Wharf and more boabs, mud crabs.  On our last evening there after we had dinner and were finishing off our wine the caravan manager dropped in and surprised us with some mud crabs.  What a treat, they sell for $30.00 a kilo direct from the fishermen, it doesn’t come any better than free! And yes they were yummy.

 

Fitzroy Crossing is our next destination.  We are now 2602km from home and 114m above sea level.  We go to Geikie Gorge to take a boat cruise along the river.  As someone forgot to bring the keys for the boat it is suggested we take a walk along the riverbank whilst someone goes back to town to get them.  I knew we were in Crocodile country but had not seen one yet so kept a keen eye on the riverbank (which was about two meters below us) hoping to spot one.  There in the shadows just below me in the water I could see what looked like a long snout and two eyes looking up at me.  Shhhhh I whispered to Gary, look there’s one.  The people walking behind me also stopped, in silence, looking and getting all excited pulling out cameras and taking snap shots what a treat.   I had spotted my first Crocolog! How embarrassing! I sware it looked like one.  I really should wear my glasses more often.  We did see many fresh water Crocs that day and I do have the photos to prove it.   A must do in this place is a visit to the Fitzroy Pub.  I really wanted to have a beer there so Gary, Dave, Merrilyn and I pulled up outside the front of the pub at 10.30am. Get in early before the locals take over. We were the only car there although one did a U turn and left as we were approaching.  Too late, there were some indigenous people stumbling around outside already and Gary said “are you sure you want to have a drink here”? Yeah yeah yeah, I said as I eagerly jumped out of the car ready for my first coldie.  There seemed to be no front entrance so we followed a fence around to what appeared to be the back of the pub but the closer we got the louder the yelling and screaming got, it sounded like there was a free for all going on, we were scared stiff and made a quick retreat back to the car, drove back to the Fitzroy Lodge and waited for the 5pm happy hour for our $2.00  XXXX middy.  We were told later that it was quite normal for the local locals to be screaming across the room to a mate on the other side having a so-called conversation as quite the norm and that we would have been very safe.  I feel sad that I did not experience being in the throng of things at the Fitzroy Pub the only thing that could have killed me apparently would have been the smell.  No offence intended to anyone. 

 The local people are very happy and obliging, not threatening at all, sadly we all too often paint certain groups with the same brush. 

 

And so our journey continues, Halls Creek, Turkey Creek to our destination, Kununurra.

Gary purchased a newspaper for me in Halls Creek and one bloke called out “hey mate, ya cross da international date line wid dat one”, meaning he purchased the most recent paper, the Saturday’s West on Monday.  What a wonderful sense of humour.

Kununurra is THE place to visit for the most spectacular scenery in W.A.  Bungle Bungles, Lake Argyle, The Ord River, Argyle Diamond Mine, El Questro and much more.  Best was to see most of it is by air so we booked a flight with Alligator Airways.  Their mini bus picked us up from our park and drove us to the airport.  I thought it strange that the driver was also the pilot, and he looked all of 20ish, my hands are getting sweaty again.  As luck would have it, Gary and I were the only passengers on the 8-seater plane (a new one) and we had two pilots, both male, it takes two of them. It was a great way to see the Bungle Bungle, Lake Argyle and the surrounding district.  We did travel to El Questro in Davids 4WD and that was fantastic.  There were some water crossings and one that comes to mind was coming back from El Questro Gorge we headed into water that would have been 80cm deep.  Waiting on the other side were a couple of big Toyota’s obviously deciding wether to attempt the crossing or not.  David ploughed through the creek, pulled up along side the “Big Toyota”  wound the window down and said “mate, if you got a Nissan Xtrail you can make it” You should have seen the look on the guys face, a photo would have been priceless.   We did a day trip out to Wyndham and it’s the sleepy little town that one would expect it to be.  Residence of the town obviously do not throw anything away, old fridges, washing machines, lawn mowers, they may be broken but you never know, a bit just might come in handy.  That’s what I thought most of the towns in the North West would be like.  We had a drink in the local pub, as one should, and their famous fish n chips basket, thoroughly enjoyed it.  I have yet to see my first Salty Crocodile but after the photo I saw in Wyndhams souvenir store it sent a chill up my spine.  There was a photo of a HUGE dead crocodile, belly up, split open and someone pulling out a human hand, apparently that of a female.   Apparently it was a copy of a police forensic photo. Scary, real scary stuff.   It was getting to drinkies time so back to our homes on wheels to partake in some serious wine tasting.  Did you know that even after you have poured your last bit of wine from a bottle there is still 30 drops of wine left.  Multiply that by 48 bottles, that must almost make it two more glasses of wine that we just throw away.   Yes sometimes we do have a little extra time on our hands and do stupid things.  Gary and I also went to the Marcia Hines concert as part of Kununurra’s Kimberley Moon experience.  Had a wonderful time even though we were not “Corporate” sitting in our deck chairs dining on fine cheeses, fine wine and of course fine Lindt chocolate.

 

All too soon we were off again, onwards to Kakadu spending five days there camping out in the wild taking in nature at its best.  Driving in it looked just like John Forrest National Park with the exception of some Pigmy Palms and Pandanus growing in amongst the paperbarks and eucalypts.  We settled in to our campsite named Mardugal and found decent ablutions (for a campsite) and grassy areas in which to park our vans.  Drink O Clock came upon us sooo soooon, out came the chairs, the mosquito coils and of course the drinks.  Sitting back enjoying a Gin & Tonic I spotted a pretty little ant with the most cutest coloured bright green bottom on my leg.  Someone said “that might bite you” so I flicked it off and discovered there were more, in fact thousands more, thankfully not on me but nearby.  It was just like I saw on the Bush Tucker Man,  ants that had made their nests in trees by sticking together leaves with some kind of webbing.  We were parked right next to these little blighters that apparently do give a painful bite.  Out came the surface spray and a decent amount was sprayed AROUND the van (not on the nest) to make a FORCE FIELD and help keep them where they belong.  I later found out that if you leave them alone they leave you alone and don’t usually come into caravans.  (Up late one night in Kununurra (1am) a big black ant walked across my foot, looking down on the floor I noticed a few more, then there were more up on the ceiling and on the lounge.  Gary, Gary, I called out (who was fast asleep) there’s ants in our van, big ones (5mm long) well you deal with it, he mumbled back.  Armed with my torch and surface spray I did the perimeter thing outside and went to bed only to be awake all night worried about being eaten alive.  I survived to bring in the next morning but was very tired.)  Hot water in an unserviced campsite is a luxury; we were advised to get in early here before the sun went down as when the solar is empty, it’s cold.  Needless to say one does not shower too early in the morning.  Or at least till the sun has been up for a while, you know those that don’t know, your hear that “shhhh……t coming from the ablutions. We visited a number of  Rock Art sites and more gorges.  Took an interesting boat trip along the Alligator River and stepped on to Arnhem Land. Had a lot of interesting information fed to us by the local indigenous guide and saw my first real salt water crocodile (at least 3meters long)  close up and not too personal from the comfort of our boat.  We went to the Ubirr Rock Art site and climbed up to the Nadab Lookout to watch a beautiful sunset over the hectors and hectors of wetlands.  It was quite breathtaking.  Our stay in the national park was good but Gary says that if you really really knew you would never never do, Kakadu.  I guess it’s almost a fair statement. Some of it is a little like home minus the corc’s and gorges.

 

Darwin our next destination. 

 

Cheers

Mary

 

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Newsletter 5 – Written 25th of July 2007

 

Hello once again,

 

Darwin at last, the place that left me scarred for life and I am sure I need counselling but more on that later. We are at the top end of our western world even though it’s the NT.  Rolled into our BIG 4 resort style caravan park and were given a location right next to the clothesline.  The thought of people peering into our van whilst hanging up their washing did not appeal to me at all so I asked for another location and as luck would have it, just one site up from the clothesline there was a “noice” spot for us to settle into.  It took Gary 30 minutes to manoeuvre the van into the new location, of course not without my help.  Why is it that a male cannot tell the difference between left and right?  When I am yelling “turn right, turn right” whilst pointing left, any idiot knows it means the van needs to turn to the left. I guess the fact that we were gaining an audience as well did not help our situation.  Finally settled I check out the ablutions, which I now rate according to the toilet paper they provide.  One ply, not so good, two ply, better, three ply, 1st class luxury.  Our new place of residence had three ply! We were of course at a 5 star caravan resort.

 

The next morning I was to experience the most shocking sight ever.  Opening the door after completing early morning business in the ladies powder room, I noticed an older rather large lady facing the mirror wearing a mini towelling dressing gown.  As if in slow motion, she dropped her hair brush and before I could turn away down she went exposing her rear, full on in my face, leaving nothing to the imagination.  You guessed it, not a stich on underneath.  Forever etched in my mind is a vision of this very wrinkly, flabby, fatty, behind and other unmentionable dark bits that no one should ever have to see.  I quickly stepped back into the toilet, closed the door before I could be seen, sat and waited till I felt she had gone, not wanting to put a face to, well you know what, in case our paths should ever cross.  Unless your body is comparable to that of Elle McPherson, forget putting on that shortie gown, you never know who saw you and might be writing about you!!!!!!!

Needing to clear my mind of this unfortunate event Gary drove me into Darwin for some serious therapy.  I assured him that this was the only cure for my very serious condition.  I managed to rehabilitate myself through the purchase of a large slouch style leather silver bag.  Sounds tacky? Well it is and no one would dare steal it.  I think its very “Paris”.  I am still not completely cured, matching shoes may assist towards total recovery.  During our two week stay we had time to relax and use the lovely facilities of our resort.   As luck would have it the V8s were coming to Hidden Valley raceway, just down the road from us.  So, having purchased corporate tickets (Penthouse Suite) Gary and I spent a Saturday and Sunday living the high life on Champagne, Chardonnay, Seafood and fast cars.  There was an incident that occurred during the latter part of Sundays racing.  One of the young men at our stand  saw a photograph of our two beautiful daughters that I keep in my wallet and naturally asked if they were single, to which I replied that they were not.  Disappointed he turned and made reference about me to one of his mates to which I responded “I heard that comment, I know what it means, it’s most inappropriate but I will take it as a compliment”  (famous remark from American Pie “mil#”).  I had never seen anyone blush so much and be so apologetic.  Also my therapy bag, no one would dear steal it, I was able to leave it lying around with out any worries.  We managed to get to a football match between the Dockers and Bulldogs, and yes it happened right before our very eyes, the Borat look alike in THOSE thong bathers. He was so quick I barely managed to get the camera out and get a shot of that bare bottom racing across the oval managing to avoid security and then been saved by the spectators as he jumped the fence and into the crowd.  It was over in a flash. And so was our time in Darwin.   

 

Leaving Darwin we headed for Litchfield National Park, staying in the town of Batchelor and doing a day trip to the Park.  The great thing about this national park is that you can see almost all of it in one day, as we did.  

 

Moving on, our direction is eastwards towards Cairns.  En-route we drove through some quaint places but the most interesting was our overnight stay at Daly Waters.  As you drive down the only road that leads into this place you know your there as one must dodge the chooks and dogs roaming the end of the road where the old Pub stands.

The town was used as a stop over for the then newly formed Qantas airlines in the 1930s.  The tiny Pub, clad in corrugated iron, still stands serving beer and a Beef & Barra BBQ dinner seven days a week.  In side the old pub the bar is surrounded by underwear, hanging from the roof rafters, stapled to the supporting posts and around windowsills.  There were bikinis, G-strings, jocks and bloomers all signed and dated.  Elisa, Lynne, Bev, Graham, Brian just to mention a few names, are yours hanging somewhere there too?  For the princely sum of $19.95 not only did you get a good serve of Beef and Barra but a great selection of salads and damper.   There was entertainment too.  A bloke reciting poems, singing, playing a guitar whilst balancing chooks on his head.  It felt like a true outback experience.  Our journey took us through overnight stays in Three Ways, Barkley Homestead and on to Mt Isa in Queensland.  This was surprisingly a large town with even a Kmart there.  Stayed only the one night and moved on to Cloncurry the next day where we stopped for a bite to eat at one of the café’s.   Having travelled only 138km we decided to continue on to Charters Towers. This was a beautiful old charming town with its old buildings still standing and looking in original condition.                                                                              

 

There are lovely little café’s in most of the country towns we visited, one in particular is stuck in my mind because the person serving me was a nice looking country girl, but, when I looked up to hand over money for my purchases all I could see was moustache. Moustache, moustache, moustache, its terrible because you don’t wish to look but then you cant believe your eyes, really long hairs on the chin and upper lip.  Good on her for feeling so comfortable with something that other women would never be caught dead with, yet there she is in the public eye serving coffee and cake.  We decided to make our next stay in a town in the Atherton tablelands called Mareeba.  This town is known for its rodeo’s but also over 75% of Australian Coffee is grown here.  We parked at the local rodeo grounds and used it as our base from which we travelled to Kuranda and the Daintree forests.  Mareeba is the kind of town where Dior could be mistaken for a brand of air freshener, it’s a very down to earth town.  A visit to a coffee grower was in order for me because I do like me coffee.  North Queensland  Gold Coffee centre, sounds impressive, well it should be because it was the first one to plant coffee bushes in the area.  The owners have their shed open 7 days a week complete with chooks roaming around on the lawn outside and  where inside the hubby makes the coffee tastings and does the guided tours and the missus bags the beans and takes the money.  He is 82 and she, 81.  Much more enjoyable than some of the up market $12 a head places we went to but declined to patronise, for that amount I was able to taste, see and take home 1kg of ground coffee.

 

 

Cairns is just beautiful, green everywhere you look, lush winding roads that lead to either a dam or a waterfall.  The city of Cairns is right on the ocean but because you cannot swim the beaches due to Tropical Jellyfish or Crocodiles, there is a large man made pool adjacent to the ocean surrounded by lovely lawns, and as I noticed Gary looking around, lots of  lovely topless young ladies sun baking.  I guess its better than seeing a bunch of old ladies sunning topless, I think even Gary would need therapy if he saw that sight.  I wonder, would he go for the bag therapy or shoe therapy?

A whole week has gone so quickly, could have stayed longer but eventually all trees start to look the same and all the beaches start looking the same.  We headed towards Townsville stoping at a tiny place called Kurrimine Beach.  The first real coastal spot that has not quite been exploited by the mass exodus of city folk looking for their “sea change”.   Post card perfect place with coconut palms fringing the beach and lovely yellow sand along the shore, that is, until the tide recedes back for about 100 meters.  Then its just mud and rock.   If you’re a local here then you have a boat, if you have a boat then you need a tractor, a big tractor.  Obviously due to tidal movement, no tractor, no boat.  Its nice to be in a place where one is not tempted to shop. There is nothing here, only tractors and boats.  A two-night stop and then we moved on to Cardwall.  A pretty town on the coast and a stones throw to Hinchinbrook Island.  So why does a return ferry trip cost $79.00?  Does the cost include a silver pair of shoes? The island is just a couple of Kms from the port, what is over there?  Any way I decided that no matter what I was going to spend some time sitting on the sandy part of the beach and read a trashy magazine and just ignore the crocodile warnings.

 

Forward  we push towards Townsville.  What awaits us there? My silver shoes?

 

Needing more therapy,

Mary

 

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Newsletter 6 – Written 23rd August 2007

 

Hello,

 

Townsville is quite an ordinary town but Magnetic Island is just beautiful.  The return catamaran fare is only $26.00 and an all day bus pass on the island $11.00.  Actually during our bus tour around the island we happen to witness something quite thought provoking.  Opposite one of our stops was a gentleman who looked to be in his late 50’s lying on the pavement being resuscitated by two young people.  I bet he was enjoying the island taking in the sights not at all expecting to be lying on the ground hanging on to life.  I don’t know if he survived but the young couple that were taking turns with CPR must have been working on him for at least 20 minutes before assistance arrived.  It really is important to have some first aid knowledge.  We should all make the effort to learn because you could save someone’s life one day.

Now that I have hopefully made some of you think about taking some first aid classes so that you can become heroes, the rest of the day on the island was truly magic.

 

Airlie beach next stop.  The gateway to the Whitsunday Islands.  This place screams “young people”.  Any time of the day or night the pubs are a mill of people chatting and drinking.  A very casual atmosphere with rich and poor all wearing shorts and thongs.  I love this place.  Highlight was a day out on the 85ft “CAMIRA” catamaran. The day began quite overcast with some wind but we were promised that it would clear up by lunch time. As I sat out on deck I kept telling myself seasickness is all in the mind fighting off that queasy feeling in my stomach.  Gary was fine, all snug and dry inside the cabin.  I knew that once they opened the bar facilities and I had some anti seasick wine, all would be fine.  Whilst waiting for the bar to open I did some snorkelling on the reef just off Whitsunday Island.  I was so glad that I had taken my own diving gear especially my 3mm wetsuit.  While the others were freezing in the water I was enjoying a lengthy swim taking in the underwater sights till someone gave me a nudge and pointed out that everyone else had gone and there was just me and one of the crew sent to get me.  How easily one could be left behind, just like that movie about the couple diving on the Great Barrier Reef, scary.   Back on boar we enjoyed a lovely buffet lunch along with that all important seasickness cure.  Whitsunday Beach was our next stop, it had the finest white sand that I had ever seen and it squeaked underfoot as you walked along in your bare feet.  As everyone knows Gary hates sand and sea so he was the only one who stayed onboard whilst all others had fun in the sun and sand.  Sailing back I had no trouble coping with the yacht rocking in the swell, actually I had no problems with anything, not even the giant wave that drenched me!  This is a place where you do not need a lot of $$$$$ to have a fun time.  I noticed in the liquor stores plastic supermarket bags that had been pre packed with six bottles of beer, vodka mixers and other beverages that were made ready to go for the young folk.  Apparently that’s how they like to purchase their liquor, rush in grab a bag and rush out.   All you young folk that are fond of a good time, come on up to Airlie.

 

Bundaberg, Rum, woohoo!  Yes, a visit to this great Australian Sacred Site was well worth it.  How can one spend over an hour taking in all the history of how this golden liquid is created, we did and enjoyed every minute of it and the free choice of rum based cocktail at the end was all worth it.

 

After our short stay in the land of Bundy, we headed towards the Sunshine Coast, in particular Tewantin.  Gary as a young lad (7) travelled with his family to Queensland and in those days the roads went only so far.  So the small town of Tewantin was as far as the bitumen road went.  Although you may not be familiar with Tewantin you may be with Noosa Heads.  Revisiting childhood memories is always fun and for Gary there were fond memories of this little town which is now not so little.  The jetty which he spent days fishing from is still there but now is surrounded by upmarket restaurants and shops.  Of course I needed to create my own memorable moment in this special place, so, what else but “therapy shopping” I am still looking for those special silver shoes to match my silver therapy bag.  No luck so we had a lovely lunch instead, $12.00 for fish n chips.  We were unable to get a booking in Tewantin or Noosa Heads but did so in a town known as Coolum (as featured in Katy & Kim), which was only 20 minutes away from Noosa.  What a great location, we had the beach on one side and the restaurant and café strip on the other side.  As our trip is gaining interest on the net from other caravaners a photographer was sent by Adria’s promotional company to take pictures of us (the Pecks as well) for publication.  Well did we attract some attention in the caravan park, quite an audience had gathered watching how the rich and almost famous live.  Our props were bottles of Bubbly, cheese board and other fine nibbles with us sitting around looking like we do this all day.  Which of course we do! I must say that I have slowed down on my consumption of wine, I probably only consume 2 to 3 glasses per week.  Do I feel better?  I feel the same but I am happy to say that one does not need alcohol to have a great time.

 

Brisbane here we come.  We located ourselves in a caravan park that was only 4km from Brisbane CBD.  It was also not far from a major Hospital, which explained why there were so many onsite caravans that were occupied.  Cheap accommodation for those who were out patients, people with heart conditions, cancer patients and so on.  I was stunned that so many of these “patients” still smoked.  Why bother going to hospital?  To all my friends that smoke, PLEASE STOP!  You may well end up spending your last days in cheap accommodation.  Aside from being greeted by the smell of cigarette smoke every morning and that deathly coughing sound, our park was well located and neat as a pin.  Brisbane is such a bustling city and growing so fast.  People here still have a laid-back style and are very friendly to strangers willing to help if you look lost.  My only gripe is their winding roads and I am talking about major roads.  Thank goodness for our GPS, but even with this gadget one was still confused as roads branched into four exits and each of those branched yet again.  The major highways that circle around the major towns are brilliant.  Over the years that we have been visiting this state and taking note of their progress I must admit, this they got right.  My day shopping in Brisbane and I found my shoes! Perfect match to my silver bag, but alas none left in my size.  So the search goes on. Perhaps I will have luck on the Gold Coast.

 

My favourite place. The land of tanned bodies covered in bling and designer labels, Surfers Paradise.  Will my shoes be here? 

We pulled into our caravan park in Southport, which is only 5 minutes by car from the centre of Surfers.  Road works outside the park are a bit of a nuisance but then we have not had to put up with it for 12 months, sadly some businesses have suffered badly.  One cannot visit here without going to Palazzo Versace and having afternoon tea.  For the princely sum of $22.00 Merrilyn and I shared a pot of Earl Grey tea with enough scones with jam and cream, finger sandwiches and petit four cakes to fill up our little bellies!  It was one of those “noice” moments.  We were not “blinged up” but did not at all feel intimated by the opulence of the hotel.  Of course there is a Versace shop and the prices were, well, if you have to ask then you can’t afford it!

We did not ask but I did discover that a gent’s tie was $185.00, ouch!!!  Whilst we were enjoying our little bit of extravagance the boys were out and about (could not justify $22.00 for a cuppa and a bikkie) said they would call us upon their return, which they did and said they were next door at the marina.  So as Merrilyn and I made our way out of the hotel, next door happened to be Mirrage Marina.  It’s a shopping Mall, I thought it strange that the boys would be there.  After about half an hour of browsing my phone rang and a very angry Gary said where the BHell are you.  In the marina I replied, right next door to the Hotel, where the BHELL are you?  Wrong marina.  Apparently there is a boating marina next door to the shopping one. OOPS!               The next day Gary and I dined with a long time friend from the area at the Grand Hotel in Labrador at one of their many lovely restaurants. That’s the night Gary got food poisoning.  I am talking projectile type illness.  It was only 10ish in the evening so I quickly phoned the restaurant to warn them that the prawns are sus, I would hate anyone else suffer the same fate as my poor boy.   It was an answering machine that greeted me so I left a message advising them that Gary was really sick and they should check the prawns.  It was purely a courtesy call, not a “I want my money back call” because we all did enjoy our meals.  Surely someone would call me back, at least tomorrow?  No one phoned.  I called the manager the next afternoon at about 5pm and all she could say was sorry and that she had not checked her phone messages yet!!!  Not a very good way to run a business.  We had to stay an extra day in Southport as it took Gary 3 days to recover and about 5 days to fully recover. Which restaurant was it?  The Grand Hotel’s “3sixty”.  Shame on you, manager of this establishment, she did not even bother to call the next day to see how he was feeling.  Courtesy costs nothing.

 

Now that I have had my gripe, I hope you have learned something from this newsletter.

 

DO A FIRST AID COURSE (you could save someone’s life)

DON’T SMOKE. (you could save your own life)

BE COURTEOUS TO PEOPLE  (someone could save your life)

 

Now go and do something for yourself or someone else!

 

Cheers

Mary

 

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Newsletter 7 – Written 4th of September 2007

 

Hello again,

 

On our way across to New South Wales.  Amazing, the moment we crossed the border the climate changed from: Sunny one day Perfect the next, to overcast and some rain.  Our first bit of rain since we left Perth in April.  We are now truly on the road home.  Our destination today was to Brooms Head, a tiny coastal town with NO SHOPS.  Its time to rest a little and be in a place where there is nothing tempting one as in shops or to go sightseeing.   Brooms Head is just the place, two long sandy beaches to choose from, both with good surf as well as a lagoon for snorkelling and great for fishing, only one general store, paradise.  Seven days booked here with the option to extend.  The first couple of days were intermittent sunshine but nice enough for beach walking and fishing so I gave it a go.  First I used frozen sardines with half falling off as I cast the line out to sea and the other half thawing out and designating into the water.  Sadly not even a nibble. I had used the whole packet to no avail so Gary suggested that I use lures.  Across the road to the general store I went and  Mr Know it all supposedly knew it all, chose some bright pink plastic wriggly things.  “That should do it” he said so the next afternoon there I was with my bright pink wriggly plastic things on the end of the line (even the seagulls were laughing) casting out to the ocean hoping to lure a fish with no fashion sense to be tempted by my pretend bait.  Well, after an hour of casting and recasting I decided to throw in the towel and go home.  At least I still have some wriggly plastic bait intact.

 

Deciding that fishing was not going to be an option now an outing was had the next day in Maclean, which is along the beautiful Clarence River.  The town prides itself on its Scottish history and most of the buildings in the area are heritage listed which gives you a great insight into a bygone era.  The lamp poles in the town are all painted in the various Tartan Colours of pretty much all the clans that there could possibly be.  My hat off to the painter.

By the third day it started to drizzle, the whole day it just drizzled relentlessly.  The next day the serious rain began in earnest and so it continued for the remainder of our stay.  On our last night there it not just pored but it was blowing a gale.  That night I packed up all my precious possessions into my therapy bag and had it sitting at the ready next to our bed in case we had to evacuate at a moments notice.  The van started swaying as the large droplets of rain were being smashed into the van by the 90km winds and the ocean (which was only about 50 meters away over a small sand dune) sounded like a freight train was coming.  How could anyone sleep through this, well there was Gary, fast asleep and snoring, then there was me, eyes wide open and now clutching my therapy bag to my chest ready, in case a quick escape is necessary.  How could I be wide-awake and buggerlugs next to me so fast asleep in this now fierce storm.  Of course not for long as I started poking him in the ribs and saying “quick, quick, I think the van is going to get blown away or the ocean waves are going to carry us off into the Pacific Ocean”.  Gary was quick to point out that if we looked through the window at the Peck’s caravan next door, one can see that the stabilizing legs of their van were firmly planted on the ground, not moving at all which meant that we were OK and back to sleep he went.   I was not going to be fooled by this, so I stayed up most of the night keeping an eye on the Peck’s van because, well,  I figured that if the Pecks van was to blow or float away it was time to put my plan of escape in to action. Really what was I thinking. I really don’t know but it seemed like a good idea at the time.  Morning had arrived and I managed to get a little sleep but was still clutching my bag.  The morning’s news was full of pictures of damaged property around the North West coast of New South Wales and coastal Queensland.    It was decided to travel inland, away from further bad weather that had been forecasted for that day.

 

The Great Dividing Range, what a beautiful drive through the mountains.  Because of the bad weather we were driving through cloud so visibility was reduced to about 10 meters or less.  There was debris all over the road so my eyes were needed as well to negotiate through  the branches, leaves and small trees that littered the road most of the way through the mountains.  Out on the other side of the Range we headed to the little town of Glen Innes.  We were now in Celtic Country.

 

In just a few days we went from beautiful warm weather, to storms on the coast and now freezing cold weather inland.  Glen Innes is a nice country town with not really much to do.  We moved on to Tamworth after a couple of days stay heading hopefully to a warmer climate.

 

On the way I insisted that we stop in the town of Armidale in the hope of maybe catching up with a past resident of Darlington who had moved to this beautiful town some 12 years ago.  The previous day I had made an attempt to leave a message on her answering machine but there appeared to be a problem recording so I thought I would try my luck and see if anyone in town knew her.  It was a much larger town than I had anticipated, what would be my chances of  finding her now?   Walking into the main part of the shopping district browsing in the shops I entered a jewellery store and commented how cold it was.  The woman said “your obviously not from this part of the world” to which I replied “no I am from Perth”  to my amazement  she proclaimed so was she.  On the off chance I asked if she knew a Sally Rowe?  Sally, Sally, she said in deep thought, then a customer standing behind me (yet another person from Perth) said “Oh you know Sally Rowe” of course, Sally!  Would you like her phone number?  I immediately phoned Sally who apparently had just come home from a three-day country show.  What a surprise for the both of us.  We did catch up exchanging photos of our children, as, when Darlington bid them farewell our eldest children were only 7 or 8 years old.  I wish we had stayed in Armidale for a few days,  the town and surrounding areas are truly beautiful.  A place I could easily slip into and stay a while. I bid my friend farewell and we continued our journey.

 

Late that afternoon we drove into Tamworth, the land of the Big Golden Guitar, Mecca of Country and Western Music, and yes, warmer weather.

The suntan that I had is all but gone.  Two whole days in this the supposed birth place of Australian country and western and do you think we could find a pub that had such music?  Not the ones we went to.  Apparently January is the “big one” and in July they have a mini Country Music Festival. We heard that there was entertainment at The Services Club in the CBD (it was a Friday night) and that they did a reasonable dinner.  Off we went, it was within walking distance which meant no one had to be skipper.  Reasonable was right, dinner for the both of us cost only $15.00 and even the beer was well priced.  With time to spare before the entertainment began I tried my luck on the Poker machines that are forever present in all the clubs and pubs on the east coast.  How can people spend hours sitting in front of these silly machines pouring in money and watching (in my case) numerous rows of pictures with cowboys, Indians and dynamite scrolling past whilst one waits for that all important three or four in a row to line up so as to win something?  Well, I got dynamite three on the screen which would go Ka Boom and then some stupid jingle would play all of which lasted at least 10 seconds, and then, I would get a number of free games.  This would continue for quite a while, actually when I looked at my watch, over an hour had passed, me sitting here with all the other hopeless souls pressing the buttons making the wheels go round n round.  MY GOD, a whole hour! It was time to go and get a life so I redeemed my $2.00 plus my winnings, $2.00, and went to see if the music had started.  No music, no entertainment, how sad.  Gary and David meanwhile had been playing Keno and doing quite well, $70.00 worth well.  I decided this was a better return so invested my $4.00 for four games.  Good-bye to my four dollars. Don’t gamble, there are more losers than winners in this game.  We went home that night, Gary richer, me poorer and no country and western music.  Looking elsewhere for entertainment Gary and I decided to do one of the local tourist walks.  From the Oxley Scenic Lookout one could do a circuit walk of approximately 5km, which incorporates Flagstaff Mountain.  The word mountain should have been an indication of what was ahead.  It was much further and higher than I had anticipated, the old “Are we there yet” kept going through my mind as I struggled to get enough oxygen into my lungs and my legs were starting to get that burning sensation.  We passed a much younger couple further up the path who had stopped to catch their breath, actually the husband was really struggling to catch his breath, this made us feel much better so we pressed on.  We realised that our fitness level was not too bad.  When we reached the top the views were truly exhilarating.  We had conquered the mountain.

 

Leaving Tamworth behind we forged ahead towards the Hunter Valley to a town called Cessnock.  The town is well located being central to most of the 100 or so wineries in the area.  Given the number of wineries there appear to be far too few actual vines growing in the area.  I am comparing this area to our Swan Valley in West Australia which covers much less hectares but visually has many, many more vines planted.  Each vine will only produce 2 bottles of wine so where are the rest of the vines here?  I also noticed that the vines are very young, most look to be only a couple of years old.  What are they up to over here?  As for our caravan park, because we had booked in for more than 3 days, we were given a complimentary bottle of red (merlot) which was made by the owner of the caravan park from vines grown around the park. Very “noice”.

 

FLASH BACK!

An incident that occurred some weeks ago in Queensland just came to mind.  On one of our coffee stops at a service station in central north Queensland I came across a perfectly flat and dried Cane Toad.  What a find.  Must have been driven over by hundreds of cars coming into the service station where the Toad unfortunately met its fate.  Perfect specimen for some little boy to take to school for show and tell.  I picked it up and wrapped it up carefully in paper towel and sealed it in a zip lock plastic bag, just in case of any smells.  It seemed well and truly dried and pressed.  Posting it off to Elisa’s son Matthew I also enclosed a rubber glove and instructions on how definitely not to open it inside.  A week or so later I received a phone call thanking me for the instructions I had written on the outside of the envelope because, apparently it was not as dry as I thought so it stunk to high heaven!

Of course Matthew was disappointed and Elisa had the job of disposing the smelly road kill “thoughtfully”.   Did she have kind thoughts of me?  I think not.  OOPS and SORRY!

Something else that came to mind was the radio.  In West Australian country areas the only station that is on air is ABC radio.  Now at home I am a NOVA listener so ABC radio is not quite my cup of tea but as this is the only one on air, it’s the one we listen to.  Well, I have been truly enlightened, from how to deliver a calf to listening to a 1900 recording of the last living castrato singing Ave Maria. They should have left him intact.  You should give it a listen, you may learn something new. 

 

Back to real time, we are now in Blackheath, Blue Mountains country.  Its so beautiful and yes the Mountains have a blue haze which is caused by light rays passing through oil droplets that are continually discharged from the forests of eucalypt trees growing in the area.  There are so many scenic sights I don’t think we will be able to see even a tenth of it.  A place that I hope to revisit.

 

That’s your lot for now.

 

Cheers.

Mary   

 

 

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Newsletter 8 – Written 22nd of October 2007

 

Greetings All,

 

After a fly in fly out visit home we had one more day in the Blue Mountains and we managed to cram in some more sights.

The Hydro Majestic in Medlow Bath is one of the Grand Hotels from the turn of the century where the rich and famous would spend their holidays enjoying the mountain air and the breathtaking views over the Megalong Valley.  The old world charm of this place takes you back to the days of High Tea in the afternoon for the ladies and Tennis on the lawn for the gents.  By the way, High Tea in this place costs $70 per person.  With Katoomba just down the road a visit to the Three Sisters is a must.  There are many ways and vantage points to view these wonders of Australia.  I chose to take one of the walks down into the valley, which also took you past the Katoomba Falls.  Fortunately I was able to catch a rail cart back up to the top as we had walked quite a long way down to the bottom.  All too soon the day ended and there was still so much more to see.

 

In the morning we were heading to Canberra, the land of our hard earned taxes, and I must say I was very impressed.  Parliament House is quite an architectural achievement, we spent the best part of a day looking around and although modern is not my liking, this one is pretty specky!   Canberra is the word used by local Aboriginal people for “Meeting Place”.   DID YOU KNOW Australia is one of the world’s oldest democracies and we were the first country to allow women to vote, and, be elected to Parliament, and where both houses of the national legislature were chosen directly by the people. Well now you do.

I wanted to see if the 2 million (or was it only 1) we spent on Jackson Pollock’s Blue Poles was really worthy of my taxes (painted in 1952, purchased 1973).  Just as I thought, it looked crap in the newspapers and still looks crap in real life, but then, just like love, art is in the eyes of the beholder.  The National Gallery of Australia is still worthy of a visit, thank goodness they have other more recognisable works that are more pleasing to the eye.  I must mention Sidney Nolan’s Ned Kelly series, I was so disappointed, a little too simplistic for me.   Now the National Museum of Australia is really incredible, not quite what you expect and keeps one amused at every turn on every level, of which there are many.  A place I could revisit and still see more.  Merrilyn and I went to the Bus Depot Markets that are held only on Sundays and what a lovely market it was.  A lot of unusual stalls selling things such as unusual Tea blends (Pina Colada to mention one) to beautiful glass beads, collectable bric a brac, delicious breads, hand knitted apparel and lots more.  Any purchases that I wished to make had to be small, very, very small so as to be able to conceal it from Gary, the Caravan Weight Nazi (CWN).   I found it, a pretty little hand made glass bead.  Fits into my purse quite easily, undetectable by the eyes of the CWN.  I felt quite pleased with myself, a lovely souvenir of Canberra.  3 hours went by quite quickly and it was time to be home to make lunch for the boy.  On the way home Merrilyn noticed a sign giving directions to The Canberra Book Sale, who can resist any sale so we dropped by to have just a quick look.  I have never been to a book sale, it was amazing, as we were going into the pavilion people were streaming out with barrow loads of books.  I understood why once we were in, thousands and thousands of books for as little as $5.00 per bag (the green reusable shopping type).  Merrilyn and I parted ways and agreed to meet in 10 minutes.  When we did, each of us making a small purchase at the check out, were advised that there was more just around the corner, and there was, lots and lots more.  Well, we could hardly not go and have just a peek at what there was in the next pavilion.  Half an hour later and a few more books later we were back in the car wondering just how to conceal the books.  I hid mine in the car under the seat hoping Gary would not notice until I worked out where to hide them in the caravan.  I got away with it for about a week.    Enough on Canberra, its not boring and so much is free, or should I say, we have prepaid.  Oh, and the Floriade, Canberra’s spring bulb display was just beautiful and no entry fee.

 

From here we made our way to Jindabyne, which is the gateway to the N.S.W. snowfields.  Who would have thought that there would still be snow at the beginning of October.  I had 3 wonderful days skiing in the snowfields of Perisher Blue. I must mention the bargain of the month. On the way to Canberra we stopped in a lovely little town called Moss Vale in N.S.W. which just had the prettiest bulb displays in the town gardens and, whilst walking past a St Vincent de Paul thrift shop they had a sale on all skiing equipment. I managed to purchase some ski boots and skis for the princely sum of $8.50. $5.00 for the skis and $2.50 for the ski boots.  I just gave the lady $10.00 and said I got a bargain at that.  Sadly the skis were broken and unrepairable but still at that price, I could afford to throw them away.  The boots are actually as good if not better than my Salomon Ski Boots at home.  Hows that for a bargain!

 

Weather dictates as to where we end up so from Jindabyne’s windy and cold climate our travels took us to Lakes Entrance in Victoria.  A place where the Victorians come to take in the sun and surf, like it every is sunny in Victoria.  A very pretty place but quite windy the whole time were there.  A boat cruise to the winery was a most memorable excursion.  Boarding the vessel named “Corque” we had a lovely trip up the lake to the winery which was god knows where as we were plied with wine the moment we boarded the vessel and I only need one glass on an empty stomach to get me going.  The captain promised us sightings of seals, dolphins and mermaids of which we saw only the seal.  Questioning the captain on the other yet unseen attractions he promptly told me to “shut up sit down and enjoy the cruise”.   Arriving at our destination and  now being referred to as “The Boat People” we  were ushered into an old 12 seater van which then struggled up an extremely steep incline that zig zaged its way to the winery.  Getting there was quite an achievement and I was well and truly ready for another glass of wine.  I must say the wine was extremely quaffable and with lunch, very enjoyable.  A couple of hours of wining and dining and it was time to zig zag our way back to the “Corque”.  Remember I said there were strong winds, well thank god boats are tied up at Bow and Stern because only Stern was still attached to a rope and the Bow was impossible to retrieve.  Even half the jetty was under water.  What will become of “The Boat People”?  Will we be stranded and be forced to drink more wine?  Sadly not, half and hour later and they managed to board the vessel and reattach the ropes to the Bow and we boarded the rear and headed off home.  Dolphins were sighted on the way back but no Mermaids or even Mermen, it was still an enjoyable trip with excellent commentary that kept us entertained and all for the sum of $45.00 per person all inclusive.   A short stay at Lakes Entrance and then we were off again now heading to Melbourne in preparation for our Ocean cruise to Tasmania.

Melbourne, the clothing Mecca for the fashion conscious person,  Armani, Prada, Dolce & Gabbana,  is it possible to go window-shopping only?  Of course not. But the question is, how good can I get at hiding my totally in style acquisitions from the  CWN.  I work on the theory that if he cannot see it, he cannot get angry.  To hell with the extra weight that may cause us to slide backwards whilst trying to drive up a steep hill in Tasmania of which there are many.  All for the sake of looking good.  Everyone knows that if not for the many wants of women, there would be no economy.  Men would still live in caves, probably quite happy with the exception that there would be no grog!  Ah, the simpleness of men’s way of thinking.   Back to reality, Melbourne was good and I managed to restrain myself to just window-shopping.  But I will return!  We did visit the Queen Victoria Markets, which is huge, not only selling the usual, clothing, shoes, toys, fruit and vegetables but also the meat, fish and delicatessen section was a food lover’s heaven.  Any kind of cheese, salami, pickled produce, breads, cakes and biscuits, so much to choose from.  Merrilyn and I went halves in the purchase of 4 types of cheeses (each one at least 125g) for only $10.00.  I also purchased some smoked trout for only $5.00 for the whole fish and it was just yummy.  Forget the other stuff there, just go straight to the food hall.  Our last night in Melbourne so we decided to go to St Kilda for dinner.  After driving around for a while to take a good look at was available Gary (not we) decided to dine at the St Kilda baths complex (I think that’s what it was called) as it was by the sea and  appeared to have a number of restaurants to choose from.  There were actually only two to choose from and, “Gary say’s” go where the locals go.  We noticed a lot of people disappearing up some stairs so we followed as Gary decided it must be “real good”.  It was.  And it was vegetarian.  All those bean dishes and us living in a small caravan, can you imagine!.  As everyone knows, Gary hates vegetables but its amazing how a nice bottle of wine can convert the heathen, well almost.  No wonder some religions serve wine as “the blood of Christ” anything to pack them in. 

 

As promised, Gary gave me a cruise holiday, on the Spirit of Tasmania.  We had a lovely cabin with two single beds and our own bathroom and a window with a view. To top it off we dined in the restaurant with the tablecloths and wait people.  Oooh how extravagant!  The food was really nice, I had a Seafood Risotto and Gary had the Steak, both were beautifully presented and tasted delicious, helped down with a bottle of wine a great start to the trip and a nice end to an evening.  Well so we thought.  Guess who was sick with food poisoning that night?  Not me.  The poor boy was so sick that I, as in me, myself, she who is “not competent enough to pull a caravan” had to drive the van off the ship, which berthed in Devonport, the 100km or so to Launceston whilst Gary came in and out of semi consciousness.  Up hills and down dales, large logging trucks wizzing by as well as freight trucks and I made it to Launceston without a problem.  The park we were staying at was not really very nice but the location was perfect to most attractions that were in the area.  One surprisingly interesting attraction was a visit to the James Boag Brewery.  I had a wonderful time learning about the finer art of beer making, there was even a tasting at the end which was surprisingly nice.  Tasmania looks to be a very scenic part of Australia and I am sure there will be some interesting experiences to report in my next newsletter.  Till then keep well.

 

Cheers all,

Mary

 

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Newsletter 9 – Written 27th of November 2007

 

Greetings All,

 

Well I had a wonderful newsletter written and with the push of the WRONG button  all 3 pages were erased.  There is a lot to be said about putting pen to paper.  Even the “I know it all Gary” could not retrieve what I had erased.  Sadly I had just given away all the brochures on locations, which we visited, that would have assisted me in my recollections, nevertheless I shall struggle on and do my best.

 

Tasmania was fantastic, its just one big fun park for adults.  I say that because there is a noticeable lack of teens present wherever one goes.  Apparently the teenagers cannot wait to leave for the mainland and with their parents blessing they are pushed off the island to wreak havoc and mayhem and only returning when ready to settle down to have a family in a safe environment.  It just doesn’t get any better than that.

 

Our cruise over was smooth sailing except that poor Gary got food poisoning, again, from eating a steak (well done) in their upmarket restaurant (the one with the tablecloths)  poor boy, 5am and he is heaving in the toilet.  I had to drive the caravan the next morning off the Spirit of Tasmania along its narrow lanes onboard (only 5cm to spare on each side) and on to the wharf towards the customs check.  He was so unwell that there was no criticism in regards to my driving (not that I am incapable of driving towing a van) from Devonport to Launceston where we stayed for a week.  The highlight for me was our tour of Boag’s Brewery at 9am and having beer tasting for breakfast, I am not a beer drinker (except for Guinness) and surprisingly some of their beer is quite quaffable.  I was quite merry that day.  The trip along the east coast was so beautiful, one memorable spot was Freycinet National Park where we had a 7km walk taking in fabulous views of Wine Glass Bay (considered to be one of the most beautiful beaches in the world) and an exhilarating walk along Hazard beach where we were the only people to be seen for kilometres in any direction.  Driving back we stopped at an Oyster Farm and purchased one dozen oysters for only $12.00 and they were big ones.  Oysters Mary Kilpatrick were served for dinner that night, having to improvise due to lack of some ingredients.  I will give you my special secret recipe.  Equal amounts of Soy sauce and Balsamic vinegar and butter melted over a low heat until bubbling then poured over oysters in shells, topped with fine shreds of bacon and cooked under grill till bacon is crisp.  Truly yummy.  We visited many more spectacular places on the way to Hobart but I now cannot remember, so about Hobart.  We based ourselves at 7-mile beach Caravan Park that was a 20-minute drive to Hobart CBD and 30 in peek hour.  Did the usual, Salamanca Markets, Sailing on the Harbour, hiding my purchases from the Nazi and catching up with some Darlington friends.  Its not surprising that they have settled so well in Hobart,  its Perth 30 years ago, nice easy pace and everyone has the time of day to give.  We had dinner with Jenny and Harry at a restaurant on the wharf, which was quite stylish and upmarket.  Gary ordered Abalone, entrée portion, and it was expensive but when on holidays, why not.  I couldn’t help but laugh when his meal came out, a hug plate and two tiny, tiny round morsels of white rubbery things on it.  The company and conversation was most enjoyable so much so that staff  were waiting for us to leave so they could go home.  Still having so much to talk about we accepted an invitation of Port and Coffee back at their place.   They have a wonderful spot, which has magnificent views of the harbour and beyond.  Naturally a group photo was taken before we bade farewell and drove home at about 1.30am ish.  Still feeling wide-awake Gary updated his site including the photo we took that evening.  Ever wanted to look like someone famous?  Well be careful what you wish for.  The high heels I wore that night, making me a little taller than Gary, the string of pearls around my neck, the colour of my hair and how it just happened to fall around my face that evening, I looked like her, no doubt about it.  The woman who will one day reign supreme, Camilla.  Yes I looked just like her, Camilla nee Parker-Bowls.  I need a makeover, someone please HELP ME!  At least Gary doesn’t look like Charles.  Our last morning in Hobart was spent at the Cadbury chocolate factory.  Yes I made every attempt to eat my weight in chocolate but we only had five minutes before our tour began and the staff member holding the (small) basket of samples kept running away from me and hiding.   I do become a little aggressive when it comes to chocolate, however, I did purchase my favourite Cadbury product, which is Turkish Delight, 900g for only $7.00, how good is that!  It only took me 3 days to eat the lot.

 

Whilst in Strahan I passed what appeared to be a familiar face but was not quite sure where to place this person.  Later that day Gary and I walked into a Café where I saw this person again, as she served me I asked if she had a twin?  I suddenly remembered where I first met her and at the same time she asked why with a concerned look on her face.  I promptly replied “Lighthouse in Western Australia’s south west in November last year, windy day, man helping you pull down the Australian Flag” whilst pointing at Gary.  Her face had a look of relief and then looking at Gary burst into laughter remembering that day and saying “fancy meeting you here”.  It was a delightful surprise and we caught up for drinks that evening listening to all her wonderful stories as Dawn is retired and has been travelling around Australia for 9 year now, we actually spent two evenings chatting about her and our travels.

 

Like most women I like shopping and in a little town named Penguin they have a Sunday market which is just fabulous.  Apart from the usual hand made items they also had a huge Second hand section, which was so well priced.  It was really hard trying to shake off Gary so that I could make some purchases.  I did succeed and it’s become quite a challenge making 5 items look like just one.  After all I may never get to come back again and there is nothing worse than sometime down the track telling oneself “I should have got that”.   Well I sure as hell am not letting that happed to me.

 

Our nearly five week stay in Tasmania went all too quickly and there is still so much more to see in this tiny island.  I do not know if we well ever come back but I certainly feel that we could still explore so much more.  The cruise back to the mainland was uneventful as we chose not to eat onboard so we drank instead.

 

My accidental parting gift to Tasmania, a pair of red “Bonds” bikini panties left hanging on the clothes line.  I wonder if they are still there or if some freak has taken them with intentions of something grossly evil??????  Luckily I will never know.

 

Back on the mainland we made our way to a lovely coastal town called Lorne, which is on The Great Ocean Road.  A beautiful spot that I remembered visiting some 10 years ago with our friends Peter & Marilyn, stopping for a coffee and taking in the views of the small bay, which add to the charm of the place.  It’s still a pretty place only rather more upmarket and many more restaurants and frock shops, yes I managed to contain myself and made no purchases.  The caravan park was located only 50 meters or so from the town’s main street and had such pretty grounds, tall shady trees and lovely green lawn.  They also had a “MAGIC MIRROR’.  Having paid a visit to do jobbies I happened to notice that there was a full-length mirror on the wall.  Not being able to resist seeing if, I was the fairest of them all, I stood in front and was checking myself out.  You know, to see if my bum looked big, how big my saddlebags were etc, WOW I looked taller and thinner.  I couldn’t believe it, I was so mesmerized looking into the mirror I did not notice someone looking at me probably thinking I was some egotistical drama queen.  But it’s true, the mirror really did make me look slimmer and taller.  I even asked Merrilyn to check out the mirror and see if my observations were correct which she confirmed, yes she also looked slimmer and taller.  Sadly that was the only Magic Mirror that I have come across.

 

    The Great Ocean Road is so scenic and passes through many more charming towns en route.  Our next stop was in Port Fairy, again a pretty coastal town with more restaurants, frock shops and, a shoe shop!  Yes I did buy a pair of shoes, actually two pairs and Merrilyn one pair.  Walking back I discussed the possibility that I really may have only purchased one pair of shoes, just like Merrilyn.  My silver roman style sandals (which just happen to match my therapy bag) would be paraded for Gary’s approval and the invisible shoes would be just that, invisible.  While I was slipping into my sandals,  Merrilyn replied to Gary’s question that her shoes were just like Mary’s, of course … showing him a pretty pair of multi coloured high heels.  I was sprung when he asked me “how many pairs did you buy?” 

 

Travelling ever so much closer towards South Australia we stopped at the Twelve Apostles (well eleven now because I think “Judas” fell out of grace) and what a sight to behold.  They look so much more impressive than I had imagined and cover quite a long part of the coastline.  The viewing facilities are brilliant and so many to stop at, I think we were in the vicinity for at least 2 to 3 hours then we pressed onwards, I feel that we are now on the road home.  We stopped in McLaren Vale for a couple of nights to take in the wine region.  Nice facilities but?  I hate bathroom facilities that have shower curtains.  When you turn on the hot water and have the curtains drawn across the rising hot air pulls in the curtains and wraps around you like cling wrap around a chicken carcas, its soooo grose especially if they are wet from the previous user.  I think I may again need some therapy.

 

Every morning and every night I am greeted by a smiley face that looks after my tooth brush.  It’s a little plastic hinged box with a suction cup back that is pressed onto our mirror and you slip your tooth brush in it.  Thanks Dawn G, the giver of this gift, the only other smiley face in my bathroom is Gary.  From now on I am going to keep written notes as reference and not rely on modern tecno so much.

 

Cheers all,

Mary

 

 

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Newsletter 10 –

 

 

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Newsletter 11 -

 

 

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Newsletter 12 -

 

 

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